Wowza! Can you believe it?! I will be 30 weeks this Thursday! Little girl is kicking and getting stronger each day, that's for sure. And I already love her so much. This blog right now is more of a journal of sorts for me, and hopefully if you find yourself reading this, it will help you too in one way or another. Here are some of my thoughts right now.
I already love my little girl so much: I knew I would love my little girl. But wow, I really love her! I get emotional thinking about how much our Heavenly Father loves each of us so much and how much He is trusting me to be a mom to this little girl He is going to miss so much. It's a little hard to describe, but the closer I get to delivering her, the stronger I feel her presence with me and it's like I am getting to know her more and more with each passing day. When I was very sick, I had several dreams of my little girl. I knew I would survive my flare and live because I was going to become her mama. As soon as I became pregnant, I knew I was having a girl even before the ultrasound confirmed. I have felt that she and I are meant to be together, and it is a very humbling thought to become her mom! I will always look at my little girl and be reminded of God's promise of hope and healing through my sickness. I think it is very fitting that my strong daughter will be born during 2020, the craziest year I've ever lived through, and a global pandemic. Of course she will be born this year! She has already fought so hard to get here and she is teaching me again and again that I can do hard things, and so can she. She is also reminding me that there is always so much to hope for and find joy in, even in 2020. I think she has blessed many lives of friends and family through her hope, and she is not even here yet!
Update on Crohn's: Thankfully, my Crohn's is doing so well! I am thankful to be taking Humira and I know that it is a leap of faith, but is quite possibly the reason I am alive and able to be pregnant. This medication, though not risk free, is providing my body the ability to stay in remission. I have been able to enjoy food (more on that below) which has been so nice because I have not been able to do that in many years with my Crohn's. My digestion is relatively symptomless, unless my anxiety becomes heightened. I recommend counseling to anyone, especially those with IBD. And taking my prenatal, probiotic, getting plenty of exercise, and sleep is my self prescribed regimen that works pretty well for me. Oh, and learning to trust Doctors. Though scary, (because I like to be in control of the situation), learning to trust others and asking for help has been such a faith building experience and I am being blessed through physical and emotional health through learning to trust. I know I need to keep a close eye on my symptoms though as flaring is more common after delivery.
Focus on Living a Healthy Lifestyle: Well, I am finally experiencing a "normal" health challenge haha. Not just Crohn's, but something actually quite common. Surprisingly, last week I was diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes. I am really quite surprised! I exercise 5-6 times a week, relatively intensely for being pregnant. And despite indulging in some cravings, eat quite healthy otherwise. And I maintain a healthy weight. This has been some humble pie for me and the test itself was not fun at all. I had to first do the one hour test and then the three hour test. Let me tell you, the three hour test is rough! Instead of 50g glucose it was 100g (not good on the tummy!) and then they do 4 different blood draws and for some reason can't leave the catheter in the arm so I had to get poked on 8 different attempts including a ruptured vein. I think that all my Crohn's testing over the years has scared my veins and blood draws are usually hard for me. I am learning however, that Gestational Diabetes is not my fault and is a pregnancy complication that can happen to anyone. I am working really hard though to improve my diet, which is bringing me back to my health coaching and giving me ideas to share.
Finding Myself as I Become a Mom: Since graduating, I have had several jobs and haven't quite settled in on my "path". Becoming a mom is narrowing my focus and all else seems to be falling into place. I still have hopes to do health coaching, whether on my own or for a business I do not know. But I know that doors will open up after I settle into a routine with my new babe. She inspires me to chase my dreams, as she is my biggest dream come true. And I would like to share an exciting update that I feel like I am being led to. The support group for Utah County IBD I facilitate is really growing! For more information there find us on Facebook "Utah Valley Crohns and Colitis Support Group.
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